Cooler than the Delacroix of French cuisine

Though I'd still love to make a few delicious snacks with the man and then hang out and re-dub original Iron Chef episodes:

http://blog.zap2it.com/frominsidethebox/2010/09/alton-brown-talks-good-eats-2-celebrity-chefs.html

Oh Alton, it's so good you're not my type or this crush would turn embarrassing.