What I like about the Bluths is that they always leave a note.

[feldman]

Why didn't anyone tell me these things?

~*~ Thumbdrives. With portable software. Are massively cool. Currently
I'm trying both Notepad++ and Rough Draft for writing, some random task
manager to see if it's more useful than annoying, and I've even got a little
photo editor for the occasional crop and adjust away from home. I save to
my laptop at home and to Gmail when away.

~*~ Writing a list of "have-dones" is more focusing than knocking off a list
of "to-dos". A BA in psych and I still have to learn cheap psychological
tricks like this the hard way.

~*~ Don't hate me for this one, but I used to find it rather easy to
accomodate menstruation. In retrospect, it was a mere sluggish creek
compared to the raging torrent visiting me these days. I've heard stories,
and while I believed them, I also cherished my body's desultory dotting of
Is and crossing of Ts when it got around to having a period.

Alas, no more. The "cold water for blood" technique isn't the arcane
laundry hoodoo I thought it was, as I'm not only applying it to the
occasional pair of delicates but also to sheets, towels and the floor. I'm
not concerned: it's shifted from one slope to the other on the bell curve,
but still within normal, just the new normal, which is apparently
less like paperwork and more like ritual slaughter.

Gentles, please share with me your favorite iron and protein rich foods.
What has fortified you after formidible blood loss, be it cyclical,
charitable, or accidental?

And now, a rant.
Here's some YouTube videos I want to see someone make: commercials featuring
real laundry and real messes cleaned up by real
people. No coy grass stains next to maroon dollops the size of a quarter,
as if skinned knees are the main source of blood in clothes. I want to see
the kitchen towel I had to salvage yesterday, which looked like it had
cradled a traumatic head wound.

I don't want to see another pack of tweenie-boy soccer hooligans flinging
mud and orange pop onto the pristine tile of a cavernous suburban kitchen
while Chinos Mom gasps in horror as she flashes back to beer-bonging with
the dirty white hat crowd at college.

I want someone corraling curious kids and cats while their partner attempts
to remove raspberry jam and imbedded glass shards from twenty-year old
linoleum that was dark reddish brown and disturbingly sticky to begin with.

I want stain-stick pens with wide chisel tips and barrels made to look like
fountain pens, marketed in an upscale manner to professional women who also
happen to have impressive racks (which we all know are more of a lunch
magnet than a nice tie).

I want to see a dad helping his son sort his socks and underpants by
"vaguely pink" and "vaguely blue" and trying not to laugh as he explains to
the sullen boy that yes, he does still have to do his own laundry and hey,
this is where that color sorting step I told you about but you thought was
stupid comes in handy, and well, if it really bothers you there's this great
stuff we call "bleach", but honestly, dad was a punk in high school and if
the old man could rock a skirt back in the day then junior can get the fuck
over some pink socks. And they have a bonding moment. And I smile through
my glistening tears.

The sky is very pretty in my world.

Comments

[kernezelda]

Typically, when the rivers red are about to flow, I crave beef and brussel sprouts. Lots and lots. In the past few years, I've begun to enjoy spinach and collard greens, too, and find myself hovering around the deep green veggies when my shopping coincides with the hormonal pre-flux.

Your ideas for commercials are sound and should be implemented at once, yes.

*goes back to reading vampire manga*

[rubberneck.livejournal.com]

I have brussel sprouts and spinach in my fridge right now! And steak in my belly! And beef jerky in my bag for breakfast tomorrow!

[(Anonymous)]

*SNEAKING IN IN STEALTH MODE*

HYDROGEN PEROXIDE IS THE WAY TO GET RID OF THOSE REALLY NASTY BLOOD STAINS. SERIOUSLY. WORKS REALLY WELL. BUT REALLY THE COLD WATER ATTACK WITH SOAP IS A CLASSIC FOR A REASON.

i TEND TO CRAVE A REALLY GOOD HAMBURGER OR SOME BRAUNSCHWIGER.

*LOVE SON YOU LIKE WHOA*

-YOUR SCHMOOPY

[rubberneck.livejournal.com]

*TACKLEHUGS SCHMOOPY*

Liverwurst is a fucking excellent idea, which I shall implement ASAP.

*turns up the heating pad and snuggles closer*

[pktechgirlus.livejournal.com]

Red River Days. Ugh! I don't miss those.

A couple of things to try on the blood removal front that worked for me:

Peroxide-just pour it on and it'll bubble away just like it would on a cut, but that can get to be kinda expense if you're talking bulk.

Which brings us to cold water and dish detergent: rinse the stain with cold water, apply a generous glob of the detergent, lather, rinse, repeat. The same ingredients that unstick the food from your plates break down the proteins in the blood that are sticking it to the cloth.

And at the risk of sounding even more like a commercial, you might try Overnight Maxi pads by Kotex. They really helped cut down the number of...er...um...bio-hazard spills for me.

[rubberneck.livejournal.com]

That's it, I'm going to have to get some peroxide. I've already run through my stock of period underpants and I'm only halfway through.

Alas, pads hate me as much as I hate them. I've become a fan of the Instead cups, as they eliminate the One Big Problem I had with tampons (very similar to how a cigarette that sticks to one's lip can take a bit of skin with it--^!@%^#). What I've found out this week though, is that one's cup can definitely runneth over, surprise!

[raithen.livejournal.com]

here via kath, and just want to say yes to the peroxide. it's essential! also, oxyclean as a laundry booster, because it basically makes h202 in the machine, and will catch stains you miss (still pretreat ASAP with H2O2 though).

There are some natural "oxyclean" type alternative powders -- I think Ecover and 7th Generation both make one. As well, the natural "bleach alternatives" are often peroxide based, if you read the label, so that might be a good laundry boost too.

As for foods - red meat (MMM. LAMB). Beets. Beets are AMAzING. Spinach. Brocccolli. All your dark green leafies, basically. And if your energy starts to get low, floradix makes a lovely, organic-source (as opposed to inorganic source, and thus bioavailable) iron supplement -- look for it at a health food/vitamin store.

/random nose poking in by friend of friend :D.

[kernezelda]

Hey, Feldman.

Didn't you once have an FS icon from A Prefect Murder, where John is contemplating a lakka bulb? I don't remember the text, but if that was yours, would it an awful bother for you to post it? Just recently, I've had a hankering to see it, don't know why.

[rubberneck.livejournal.com]

Please see new post (in about 10 minutes).

[kernezelda]

You're a sweetheart!

[scorpy808.livejournal.com]

Two words for your new normal: blackstrap moleasses. But take it when things start to get going - 1 tablespoon in the morning and one in the evening, or you can dump it into some hot water and drink it (although I prefer to just get it over with). It's loaded with good stuff and I've found it has an amazing ability to still the ah, flood "waters". I got immediate results, but I hear for some it takes a little longer.