eleutheria

[feldman]

ελευθεριa

I've always been open to the idea of a tattoo. Just didn't know what or where. I can't even title a story without wanting it to have multiple meanings, to resonate in a chord instead of a note. I've considered and lived with the idea of several, and discarded them as I grew out of them, realized that they were lessons learned or memorials in my heart that I didn't have to inscribe on myself.

I'm leery of the impulse. But that's me, that's one of the things about me. Big decisions I'll make in a flash and know they're right. Little ones I'll gnaw over forever. I think that's it--so far it's felt like a little decision based on chiding myself, or something aesthetic, or wanting to mark a passage. So far the only profoundity I'd want to mark left its own scar, this child cut out of my body, who'd nurse and dig her toes into the edges of the wound. This is my Cmonkey tattoo, a silver line with little circles weighing each end.

I don't want to mark my body to show where I've been, or where I think I should go. I don't want redundancies or harrassment. I want a graphic manifestation on the surface of what lives in this skin.

ελευθεριa means freedom. Terrifying, world-changing, inexpressible freedom. It also fits the multiple meaning clause, in that personally it has some literal resonance as well. Understanding that I am free is the basis of everything else that has been or will be in this life.

So here I am, thinking about this. What I want it to look like, and where it wants to live on me. Then I need to save up and find an artist I like.

Comments

[thassalia.livejournal.com]

I'm going to respond to your e-mail as well (just checked everything tonight, post-wedding). I love the idea of this word, all around, I think it's a beautiful and resonant choice. I also think that placement wise, you'll know the more time you spend with the idea as a happening, not a possibility. That stuff comes, the rough doodles, the moment of insight. It all comes.